As I take a good look at things, I have come to the conclusion that she was right.
When I text a friend and ask how their day is and they write "Sally fell off her bike," I write "I am so sorry." Or they write they have had a bad day and need a nap, I write back "I'm sorry, what can I do to help?"
When I call someone from work I say "I am sorry to bother you, but....."
When I have prayed about a subject and have made decisions, I say to the person that I am explaining it to, "I am so sorry but I am not going to be able to help with........"
Yesterday at the doctor's office, a 3ish year old little boy was being loud and not listening to his parents, the father took the child out of the room, kicking and screaming, and the mother stayed in the waiting room. She looked at me, motioned to the area that the child was just in, and said "I'm sorry." I looked back at her and said "no need to be." The father came back in the room with the child and he was quiet.
Why? Why? Why are we so SORRY?
I did not cause Sally to fall off of her bike. I did not cause my friend to have a bad day. I did not make that person work in that job where they have to answer my phone calls. And it was not that mother's fault that her little boy was having a melt down. They all do that at times and they handled it appropriately. So, why are we sorry?
I think that it is normal to want to help others (although lately I wonder what is happening to the world, I was raised to want to help others, I guess some weren't!) but that doesn't mean that we have to feel sorry for them or ourselves. There is a difference between apologizing and encouraging, a big difference!
So, instead I have been trying to offer help and encouragement and have honestly been trying NOT to use the word sorry. I have typed it in text messages and then deleted it (especially to my friend who told me that I said it too much)!
We need to leave our worries to God and we need to support our friends! We need to love on them and show them God's love! We do not need to be SORRY unless we truly are apologizing for a wrong deed! I have been there before and I am sure that I will again!
But in the mean time, I am not sorry!
