Sunday, November 27, 2011

Unnecessary Noises!

My last post was kinda mushy and serious, this one, however, is NOT!
It sticks with the theme of OCD and my issues with not having control, but is completely different.

I will just warn you now that I am admitting that I have this problem and really don't plan on changing it.
I work on it some but don't really see me changing completely, just tellin' ya!

I HATE unnecessary noises! Completely cannot stand it! Now, let's define unnecessary noises:
Clipping finger and toenails, that noise is awful, now I know clipping is necessary, but I can't stand the noise!
Clearing your throat, cannot stand it!
Sniffing or sucking snot back into your head, terrible not to mention unhealthy, just blow it out!
The noise that the timer on my dryer makes when it is on but not running, like a ticking noise, unnecessary!
Slurping or sipping noises, like when people drink coffee or eat soup, use your manners people!
When people stir their drinks and clang the spoon to the cup, over and over again, come on!!!!!
The blinker (or turning indicator, as my husband calls it) on my car, why do I have to hear the noise inside the car, isn't the point to have people outside of the car know that I am planning on turning, I ALREADY know that I am turning, I turned on the blinker, I wish I could turn off that sound!

Ok, I could probably go on and on, but I won't. You get the idea.
Now, I know that I should probably just chill out and I honestly do try.
You people who work with me or in the mental health or medical field, are probably saying that I need medication or therapy for these issues. This goes along with the obsession to planning and will probably be diagnosed if I ever get that psych eval!

I just try to ignore it and deal with it, but I just wish someone could tell me why we have to live with unnecessary noises! PLEASE!!!!!!

Ok, I have that off my chest and feel better now, thanks for listening (or reading) to me vent!

Saturday, November 26, 2011


Plans! We all make plans. We plan our days, our weeks, and our weekends. We plan meals, parties, and events. I REALLY enjoy planning things. I have been told (by many people) that I take it a little overboard. I have self diagnosed myself with OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). Now mind you, I do not have the sufficient degrees to be diagnosing anyone with anything, but never the less, I am pretty sure that if I ever had a psych eval, I would have OCD! There are other reasons that I think I have OCD, but that is for another blog post!
I just have to know the plan for everything. I will wake up on a Saturday with absolutely nothing to do and ask Larry, “So, what is the plan for today?” This really bothers him. He does not like to have plans or to-do lists even when they are necessary! I want to know what we are cooking, when the meals are, if we are going anywhere, where we are going, what we are buying, what time naps and bedtimes are, you get the picture! I will admit that it gets a little excessive.
Now, I will say that organizing and planning things are good but when it consumes you and annoys other people, it might be time to evaluate things. Insert my favorite Bible verse:
Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”
I have had to quote this to myself on NUMEROUS occasions. Now, I know that God is concerned with every aspect of our lives and he cares about our meals, weekends and parties. However, I feel like this verse is more geared toward bigger plans such as our careers, families and futures. But it can apply to every decision that we make.
When I was little my mother had these books that we put each year’s school picture in and wrote a few things about each year. Like our teacher’s name, our friends’ name, and what we want to be when we grow up. Mine always included: mommy, missionary, teacher or nurse. Nowhere did you find Social Worker or Juvenile Officer. I started out in college as a nursing major, for one class. Now, I don’t mean one semester class. I mean one 50-minute class! I went to one class session and decided that is not what I wanted to do. I completed my associates with no major and then decided to do Social Work. Now, I went into social work thinking school or hospital social work. I told people over and over that I would never work in foster care or child abuse and neglect. The March before I graduated in May, I applied for a job that my mother found in Kirksville, Missouri at a Mental Health Center. They arranged for an interview and when I got there (3 hours away) for the interview, I drove into the Children’s Division (Division of Family Services) parking lot. I was so confused. I went in to get directions and found out that I was at the right place. I had applied to work in child abuse and neglect and didn’t even know it. I went ahead and interviewed just to get the experience and ended up getting the job and they wanted to hold it for me until I graduated! I just KNEW that I didn’t want to work in child abuse and neglect and foster care and I have now worked in that exact field for over 7 years and wouldn’t change it for anything!
Also, when I was little, I had my whole life completely planned out. I would marry right out of high school, have 5 children and stay at home with my kids (all while being a teacher, missionary and nurse, of course)! As you know, none of that worked out, so far! I had a boyfriend my senior year in high school and we dated for almost 5 years. We got engaged, and of course, I had everything PLANNED! The wedding, the house, the children, EVERYTHING! Things didn’t work out, obviously, and that was totally not in my plans! Having a failed engagement, un-planning wedding plans and admitting that I wasn’t perfect were not in any of my plans when I was little! Fast forward a few more years, I meet the man of my dreams, Larry, while working in the job that I never thought I would have!  Larry and I knew each other and then dated for a while and were married in April of 2007! I know this sounds crude, but I never thought that I would marry someone who was divorced or already had children. Those things just weren’t in my plans! But I am so glad that God had Larry and his 2 wonderful children, Kaitlyn and Wyatt, in His plans for my life. A miscarriage early in our marriage was completely heart breaking and hurtful but I am very certain that everything happens for a reason and there was a reason for that baby not to have been born. Then almost a year later, we found out we were pregnant again, and Olivia Kaye was born in Feb 2009! We love her so much and couldn’t imagine our lives without her!!!!
I am so happy that God’s plans are bigger than mine and that He is in control! I know that I love to be in control and I love to plan things, but at the end of the day, I really am happy to pray for guidance and let the Lord’s plans prevail!
Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”